A Long Walk

Wednesday, March 30 was a good day. In fact, it was one of my better days. The sun was shining so I was smiling big. I can't really be depressed or sad when the weather is lovely. I didn't have class, so I decided to get out of the house for a little while, and take a nice long walk...Jill Scott style, but on the solo tip. I walked past little girls playing, boys chilling on porches, and playing basketball in the park. I realized how nice my neighborhood is and how fortunate I am to live where I live where the crime is low, and the babies can still play. I loved it.

The more I walked, the more I thought. The more I thought, the more decisions began to form in my skull. I started concentrating on things I hadn't thought about in months, or years in some cases. I had good memories and bad ones. I thought about sneaking out of the house and never getting caught, my first kiss, and the first time my little heart was broken. I thought about the first man who ever said he loved me and whatever happened to him. I thought about my absent father, and his family who have kept their distance from me and my sisters for so long.

I thought about my maternal grandmother and all her quirkiness, well her annnoying ways. I thought about how she isn't going to live forever. I thought about how strong my mother is, and how she has raised me and my sibs to the best of her ability and beyond, and how some have strayed. I thought about my niece and how wonderful and awesome young life is. When I close my eyes, I see her pretty face and her cute smile, complete with slobber.

I thought about the most passionate night I have ever experienced, and wondered what he was doing right now, and what we would be doing if we were together right now. I thought about how unfair it is that we aren't together right now, and made myself a little sad. Then I felt better after reminding myself that everything eventually works out for the best.

I walked, and walked, and walked until I was about 2 miles from my house. I stopped to get water, and contemplated the walk back. The sun was beating down by now, and I was a little warm in my jean jacket. I damn near took the bus back, but I didnt have my wallet. So I turned around and started my journey home.

On the way home I thought about my future. I know what I wanna do, and where I want to be in the next few years. I started mapping out things in my head. I thought about what I needed to do, and my head started hurting a little, maybe it was the sun, but I'm assuming it was the fact that I need to get focused and force myself to think about these things more often. It's so easy to reminice on the past, but the future is hard to consider.

So unlike my first walk where many, many thoughts filled my skull, the long walk home was accompanied by a one track mind, and that is how Operation: Get it Together was formed.